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The A-Team

The A-Team

Starring Bradley Cooper, Liam Neeson, Sharlto Copley, and Quinton Jackson
Directed by Joe Carnahan (Narc)
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of action and violence throughout, language and smoking
Appropriate for ages 15+

    An elite group of U.S. soldiers look to clear their name after they’ve been framed for a major crime and sentenced to prison.  Once out of prison, they must figure out a way to not only reclaim their innocence, but stop the bad guys as well.

    This is the epitome of big, dumb action films.  That’s not necessarily a bad thing either.  Sometimes you need some really huge action without having to think.  From start to finish, this film is loaded down with gigantic explosives, huge stunts, and what must have been a very expensive special effects budget.  And it’s always to fun to see some new ideas that have never even been conceived before, such as a helicopter turning off to avoid heat seeker missiles, or a tank falling through the sky by parachute and shooting down drones on the way down. 

    Here’s the problem – you can’t stop for one minute and think about it.  For instance, the opening scene has Hannibal (Neeson) captured by a couple of Mexican lawmen.  One of the thugs is told to kill him.  He is about to shoot him in the head when he is told to stop and use Hannibal’s gun instead.  He tries to use it and it doesn’t work, so they leave him to be eaten by the dogs.  Now here is the problem: the scene requires the timing of the plan to be perfect.  But what would have happened if the Mexican lawman would have just shot him in the head with the working gun?  I know, Hannibal would be dead and we wouldn’t have a movie, but that’s not the point.  Everything in this film runs on perfect timing built on insane assumptions such as this.  So my suggestion again – don’t think about it.

    The acting here is a mixed bag also.  Bradley Cooper is certainly getting much better and he could very well be a superstar someday.  Neeson makes for a good Hannibal and I didn’t have a problem with Jackson as Baracus.  What did bug me was the miscasting of Sharlton Copley (District 9) as Murdock.  It’s not that he’s a bad actor, it’s just that he hasn’t gotten the accent down yet.  And it seemed like the filmmakers sort of gave up on him.  Occasionally he gives a nice red-neck, but his very thick South African pops up way too much, and only once intentionally.

    Aside from those annoying timing issues, the script works for the most part.  The dialogue is fairly witty and were it not for all of the lame CIA Lynch jokes I would claim pretty consistently funny (according to the story everyone from the CIA is named agent Lynch – haha). 

    Overall, I walked out of the theater thinking that for the most part, some of the ideas ideas were at least original and entertaining.  Ridiculous, but entertaining.  C+

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New on DVD

New on DVD

When in Rome
Rated PG-13 for brief suggestive content
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
Beth (Kristen Bell) is unlucky in love until she goes to her sister’s wedding in Italy and steals a few coins out of a local fountain.  Upon returning to America, she is confused as to why she is being heavily stalked by a group of fanatical men, when she realizes that she stole those mens’ coins from the fountain. Unless she returns them to the fountain, they will be stalking her forever.  If you just watched the first and last act of the film, you would think you were in worst film of the year territory.  The setup and conclusion are both so horrendous that it’s hard to believe the actors were able to get through their lines with a straight face.  The second act, however, has some pretty bright spots.  The men chasing her, played by Josh Duhamel, Will Arnett, Jon Heder, Dax Shepard, and Danny DeVito, all had some pretty hilarious moments and make you rethink your synopsis, that is until you get to the end.  If you are looking for the great romantic comedy that we’ve been missing for a long time now, this isn’t it.  I’ll keep searching though and let you know.  C-

Collapse
Not Rated
Available on DVD
Former Los Angeles police officer turned reporter Michael Ruppert was one of the only people who correctly predicted our recent financial crisis, almost perfectly.  Now Chris Smith (The Yes Men and American Movie) sits down for a riveting interview with him where he gives his next prediction: a new meltdown based on oil, economics, and covert U.S. policies that he thinks are leading us to an impending global catastrophe.  Is he paranoid?  Brilliant?  Crazy?  Perhaps a little of all of these, but frighteningly so – he is convincing.  His arguments have a lot of facts thrown in that are hard to refute.  This is an incredibly exciting documentary that you really should check out, no matter what your politics dictate.  A-

Supernatural: The Complete First Season
Available and Blu-ray
For five seasons now this CW show has flown under my radar, and I’m not exactly sure how, because this is exactly the kind of show I like to watch.  Supernatural follows two brothers whose father hunted evil for 22 years.  When their father turns up missing, they must hunt what their father hunts.  Along the way they run into vampires, ghosts, and demons, all of which must be brought down.  It’s a fun concept and a pretty well constructed show, with great special effects – especially considering it’s on the CW (no disrespect intended).  B

The Illusionist
Rated PG-13 for some sexuality and violence
Available on Blu-ray
Back in 2006, two magician film went head-to-head at the box office: The Illusionist, starring Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti and The Prestige, starring Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale.  The Prestige might have won the box office battle, but in my humble opinion, The Illusionist was by far the better of the two.  The acting is excellent, the story is tricky but not impossible to follow, and the production values are spectacular.  Plus, the award-winning score by Philip Glass gives the film an added dimension of beauty.  A-

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Get Him to the Greek

Get Him to the Greek

Starring Jonah Hill, Russell Brand, Sean Combs, and Elisabeth Moss
Directed by Nicholas Stoller (Forgetting Sarah Marshall)
Rated R for strong sexual content and drug use throughout, and pervasive language
Appropriate for ages 17+

    A record company intern (Hill) comes up with the bright idea of putting on a rock concert featuring the once famous, but now down and drugged-out, rocker Aldous Snow at the venue that made him famous to begin with: the Greek theater in L.A.  The problem is that Aldous is in London and the concert is only 72 hours away, and getting him there is all up to this young, inexperienced and shy intern.

    After Forgetting Sarah Marshall, Judd Apatow, Nicholas Stoller and gang decided that Aldous Snow was just too great of character to leave alone, so they decided on a spinoff movie.  Forgetting about Jonah’s turn as the waiter in Sarah Marshall, they gave him a new persona and made him the co-lead in this very original road-trip buddy film that almost works. 

    Brand and Hill have great chemistry here that shows throughout.  While at first it appears that they almost work too well together, Brand’s character fixes that dilemma and the conflict really helps not only the comedy, but also the story.  Also adding to the huge laughs is Sean Combs who steals every scene he appears in. 

    What doesn’t work here is the overly-dramatic romantic subplot between Hill and Moss.  Not only does it take away from the buddy film, but the scene where Brand, Hill and Moss finally confront each other almost ruins the picture and while it doesn’t quite kill the movie, it definitely puts the brakes on and kills the mood to the point where it’s hard to get it back. 

    Still, I went to this film to laugh, and that I did.  My wife laughed so hard it drove her into labor and we gave birth to our first son the next day.  It doesn’t possess the comedy consistency of the other Apatow projects, but nevertheless, it’s still a more enjoyable movie than most of the pictures showing right now.  B

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New on DVD

New on DVD

Shutter Island
Rated R for disturbing violent content, language and some nudity
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
When a girl goes missing in an insane asylum located on a remote island, two U.S. Marshals (Leonardo DiCaprio and Mark Ruffalo) attempt to investigate her disappearance, and anything else fishy that might be going on in the hospital run by its strangely-behaving doctor (Ben Kingsley).  Watching Shutter Island for the first time, I found myself really enjoying the ride trying to figure out what the heck was going on in the completely unpredictable world author Dennis Lehane (Mystic River) created.  Watching for the second time I understood why director Martin Scorsese wanted so badly to direct this film and what a masterpiece it truly it is.  Lots of films have surprise endings that throw a huge twist at you, but I’ve never seen a picture like this that is capable of taking you on two completely different journeys.  You could literally watch it twice back-to-back and not feel like you just saw the same film for a second time.  It is masterfully directed and wonderfully acted by the entire talented cast.  I do recommend you watch the extras on the disc, but only do so after you’ve seen the film as the spoilers will give away way too much before hand.  My prediction is that years to come, this could steadily climb many lists to reach the status as one of the great American films.  A+

Curb Your Enthusiasm: The Complete Seventh Season
Available on DVD
Much of the Seventh Season of Larry David’s hit HBO show’s excitement was brought on by the promise of the great Seinfeld reunion, and while the Rated-R Seinfeld is hilarious, some of the other episodes were so wrong and uncomfortable that my stomach still hurts just thinking about them (from both pain and laughter).  You have to have a twisted sense of humor to appreciate Larry David as he will really try to offend you if he can.  The season opens with him wanting to break up with his girlfriend because her breast cancer interferes with his ability to get out and play golf.  Then he dates a girl in a wheelchair just because he realizes that people in restaurants treat them better.  And these are minor offenses compared to some of his other misdealings.  But somehow he makes you laugh and the season turns out, once again, extremely satisfying.  A-

Ice Road Truckers: The Complete Season Three
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
250 miles north of the Arctic Circle lies Prudhoe Bay and during the winter, a brave group of truckers have three months to get as many loads to the Prudhoe Bay oil fields as they can before the road created from ice over the water, known as the Dalton Highway, melts away.  The problem is, the Dalton is the most dangerous highway in America, having claimed more than 400 people since it was built 30 years ago.  Season three cranks up the amps by adding a hot woman driver, great computer-generated graphics demonstrating exactly what can go wrong, and some of the most beautiful scenery on TV.  It’s a little too much testosterone for most folks, but the element of danger combined with big rigs and raw determination make this, at the very least, and interesting show to check out.  B-

Elvis 75th Birthday Collection
Available on DVD
Had The King made it past 1977, he would have turned 75 in January, and to celebrate, Fox is releasing this set of Elvis pics including Clambake, Flaming Star, Follow that Dream, Frankie and Johnny, Kid Galahad, Love Me Tender and Wild in the Country in one deluxe box set.  While certainly not amongst his better-known, or better-made films, the collection is sure to make some fans happy, although it would have been nice to have had them remastered for the new set.  C+

The Man with No Name Trilogy
Available on Blu-ray
Since the subject is birthdays, Clint Eastwood just turned 80 last week and even though he seems to be still going strong, these early films of his are still some of my all-time favorites of his.  This set, containing A Fistful of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, and The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly are arguably some of the best westerns ever made and yes, I’d put up young Clint above John Wayne any day of the week.  These blu-ray transfers look and sound amazing and are stuffed with special features that have been collected throughout the years.  Thanks for the birthday present Clint!  A

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Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Starring Jake Gyllenhaal, Gemma Arterton, Alfred Molina and Ben Kingsley
Directed by Mike Newell (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire)
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action
Appropriate for ages 10+

    Based on the best-selling video game, Prince follows the story of a young boy from the streets of Persia who is adopted by the king.  Years later, and upon sacking the Holy City of Alamut, the young prince discovers a dagger with the power to reverse time.  During the course of the movie he must keep the dagger away from those that would attempt to do evil with it.

    Ever since the mad success of Pirates of the Caribbean, Disney and Jerry Bruckheimer have been looking for a way to recapture that money-making magic with a new franchise and Prince of Persia seemed like the perfect vehicle.  After all, the game was hugely successful and as long as they got a big star in the title role and spent a ton on special effects, the results should be pure gold. 

    As far as the basic elements for success, they are all there.  Jake Gyllenhaal makes for a great lead due to his obvious good looks and charisma.  Ben Kingsley can always play the perfect villain and this film is no different.  Gemma Arterton is beautiful and not too annoying, although she comes close.  I will admit that the leads are a bit too pretty throughout the film though, but I guess it is the movies.  As far as Alfred Molina is concerned, he is funny at times, but his Sheik Amar is not really a great character.  What this film needed to propel itself into Pirates of the Caribbean territory is a Johnny Depp-like co-lead thrown in and Molina is certainly not it.  In fact, none of the characters are really big or over-the-top enough for a film such as this which really hurts it’s chances of being more than just a simple summer popcorn flick.

    What Bruckheimer brings to the table is a world-class production and while the characters aren’t that big, the film certainly is.  The filmmaking is done on a grand scale with huge battle sequences, great stunt work and nifty special effects.  I will admit, though, that the climactic sequence, which I’m assuming took up a major part of the effects budget, was so confusing to watch that I’m still not sure what I was seeing.  Maybe they thought if they just popped a lot of great images on screen, the audience won’t ask questions, but to create an Escher painting out of sand is confounding and should have been better thought out and much better directed.

    Still, the film is for the most part entertaining and you can tell they tried really, really hard to give you your money’s worth.  B-

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New on DVD

New on DVD

Alice in Wonderland
Rated PG for fantasy action/violence involving scary images and situations, and for a smoking caterpillar
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
What do the critics know?  After all, this Tim Burton juggernaut of an adaptation just became the sixth picture to join the prestigious billion dollar club.  So obviously audiences found something great here.  For some reason I still can’t though.  I’m just not that in love with Johnny Depp  and Tim Burton that I can enjoy their films when they are this poorly told.  Just because there are a lot of weird and strange little things going on for two hours and just because the production design (which director Tim Burton is probably best known for anyhow) is pretty amazing, the picture is still not very entertaining.  For something that looks so original on the outside, the story turns out to be so unimaginative.  I am glad that Disney decided to include a ton of special features on how they made the film, since that is a little more interesting than the film itself.  C

The Wolfman
Rated R for bloody horror violence and gore
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
Benicio Del Toro and Anthony Hopkins star in this remake of the 1941 horror classic about a man that visits his ancestral homeland to investigate the death of his brother only to find himself bitten by a creature trying to kill him, thus turning him into the legendary half-man, half-beast.  The wolfman bits are bunches of fun, although some might find them a little too violent for their taste.  The problem is that the human parts are just plain boring.  Luckily the film is only an hour-forty-five unless you watch the new director’s cut which is just at two.  Sometimes the pacing of the film makes you think it is much, much longer.  One really cool feature on the blu-ray version is it will let you watch the original 1941 Wolf Man and if you have a smart phone with Universal’s Pocket BLU app, you can even download both movies to your phone.  B

Burn Notice: Season Three
Available on DVD
Cable’s new number one series is back for season four on June 4 so USA thought they would give you two days to catch up with the season three DVDs just in case you missed out or need some brushing up.  If you’ve never heard of this show, and you don’t have time to add another show to your list, then you better not watch an episode of this one because, unfortunately, it is highly addictive.  Burn Notice tells the story of Michael Westen (Jeffrey Donavan), a “burned” spy that has been left dry in Miami with his assets frozen.  He does mercenary and PI work for hire with his partners, Gabrielle Anwar and Bruce Campbell, to raise money both to live on and investigate who burned him in the first place.  To make matters worse for him, he now has a sexy female cop, played by Moon Bloodgood, on his trail.  This is one super fun show full of style and wit and while the eye-rolling does occur from time to time, you can’t help but feel entertained.  B

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Shrek Forever After

Shrek Forever After

Starring the voices of Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, Cameron Diaz, and Antonio Banderas
Directed by Mike Mitchell (Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo)
Rated PG for mild action, some rude humor and brief language
Appropriate for all ages

    In this fourth and final installment of the Shrek series, Shrek finds himself a husband, a father, and stuck right in the middle of a mid-life crisis.  After all, he used to be a fierce ogre, and now no one is the least bit scared of him anymore.  But when a mischievous wizard named Rumplestiltskin offers him the chance to be feared for a day in exchange for something inconsequential to Shrek at the time, he gladly accepts the bargain.  Unfortunately, the contract he signs throws him into an alternate universe where his very existence may be in question at the end of the 24 hour period. 

    It’s hard to believe that the first Shrek came out in 2001, but that being said, Shrek the franchise has matured with the years.  Very fitting for a movie about an ogre that feels that his best years are behind him, for in a way they are.  The first two films were wildly creative, full of invention and irreverent humor that was unlike what we had ever seen in an animated film before.  The third film was, well, let’s try to forget about the third film.  And now this movie shows an ogre that wants to go back to the beginning again. 

    As a movie, it’s actually a great tale about growing up and accepting responsibility for not just your life but for your family as well.  I’ve never thought these films were meant for children, although they can certainly be enjoyed by them, but rather they are adult in nature, and this new addition proves it grandly.  There are some nice moments throughout and much more drama than comedy.

    Here’s the problem.  Shrek is right in not being satisfied with his life in a way.  His coolness and creativity have kind of been stripped out of him by now.  This new film, while telling a clever story, is not funny nor hip in any way (aside from a few chuckles at an overweight Puss in Boots).  In fact it feels tired.  Maybe it’s because there is a brand new writing and directing team and they were wrong for the project.  But any way you look at it, the story is the very definition of irony.  And while they could have left the theme the same, they should have reinvented Shrek in a way that wouldn’t have made him so stinkin’ lame.  C+

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New on DVD

New on DVD

True Blood: The Complete Second Season
Rated TV-MA
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
In season two of the highly acclaimed HBO vampire serial, Sookie Stackhouse and Bill Compton (Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer) heat up their romance while fighting both extreme religious nuts that want them dead and an evil woman that enters their small town of Bon Temps, LA for the sole purpose of causing mayhem.  The show continues its tradition of being one of the sexiest, yet still one of the creepiest shows you’ll ever see.  The writing is smart and witty and the acting is superb.  Whatever HBO lost after the Sopranos left, it has more than made up for in its new flock of programming.  This new set of discs is a huge improvement over season one, containing loads of commentaries and special features to explore.  A

The Road
Rated R for some violence, disturbing images and language
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
Based on the Pulitzer Prize winning novel by Cormac McCarthy, The Road follows a father (Viggo Mortensen) as he he tries to protect his son from what is left of the world as it is coming to an end.  We, as an audience, don’t know how everything is over, but animal and plant life have died off and the few humans alive are all fighting for the few scraps left, and most have turned to eating each other as well.  It is up to the father and son to carry on what is left of humanity before it lost forever.  From start to finish this is a beautiful, poignant, thought-provoking, yet frightening experience.  A few years ago, Entertainment Weekly named the book the best written in the last twenty-five years.  I’m not going to say it was my favorite book I’ve read in that time period, but it is really darn good, and the images in the movie were almost exactly what I had in my mind while reading.  Director John Hillcoat, whose western The Proposal is another must see, has a way with making tough, hard-hitting films feel like poetry.  I was saddened that the movie wasn’t nominated for a single Oscar this last year as it was truly one of the great movies of 2009.  Since it didn’t pull in a big box office either, I think it’s safe to assume that many of you didn’t get a chance to see it in theaters, so I’m hoping it gets a much stronger life on DVD.  A+

I Know What I Saw
Available on DVD
Most folks consider UFO witnesses to be crackpots and whackos, but documentarian James Fox tries to convince otherwise as he presents the most credible UFO witnesses from around the world.  Military leaders, commercial pilots, scientists, and even a governor all come forth and tell their first-hand stories, some of which they were ordered never to tell by the U.S. Government.  The content makes for an interesting argument for alien existence.  Unfortunately, Fox’s skills as a filmmaker are amateur at best and the movie ends up looking more like a bad college project than a first rate doc.  He is so busy trying to present his thesis that his bias and passion get in the way of his progress.  Then again, the information was enough to make me question whether or not to call him a crackpot after the movie was over.  B-

The Virginian: The Complete First Season
Available on DVD
For many decades westerns ruled the television landscape and NBC did a very gutsy thing by launching the first 90 minute television western with The Virginian, based on Owen Wister’s 1902 novel.  Set in the mythical town of Medicine Bow, Wyoming in the 1890’s, it explored the lives and relationships of the people that ventured west to settle in the new wild land.  The popular show ran for nearly a decade and those who loved it will really love the way they are respectfully releasing the series, coming fully restored and digitally remastered in full color on 10 DVDs in a beautiful collector’s tin.  I remembered going to my grandmother’s when I was young and watching this show on her old black and white, so getting this set in full color has been a nice trip to the past for me, although with over 39 hours of content, it will be a while before I finish.  B

Spartacus: The 50th Anniversary Edition
Rated PG-13
Available on Blu-ray
This monumental epic, partly directed by Stanley Kubrick (the first hour was directed by Anthony Mann before being replaced) and starring Kirk Douglas, makes its 50th anniversary release on blu-ray in a stunning restoration this week.  Unfortunately, the problems in the movie, such as some really poor acting by all of the non-Brits in the cast, still plague the film.  After all, I don’t think anyone can sit through Tony Curtis saying “I am a singer of songs” with his New York accent without completely cracking up.  But as far as gorgeous, influential movies go, Spartacus is one of the best.  Maybe it’s because the movie is over three hours in length, but the disc is surprisingly bare of extras, containing only a few deleted scenes and a bit of vintage footage.  B

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Robin Hood

Robin Hood

Starring Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, and Max von Sydow
Directed by Ridley Scott (Gladiator)
Rated PG-13 for violence including intense sequences of warfare, and some sexual content
Appropriate for ages 13+

    Loosely based on the what we wish would be the current situation in California, a soldier comes home from fighting in the war only to find his countrymen being overtaxed by the tyrants who run the land, so using his skills as a leader and his abilities as a fighter he leads a revolution.  Oh, wait, that was the Robin Hood we used to know.  This Robin Hood tells the tale of the man that would later become that famous man that steals from the rich and gives to the poor.  It tells the origin of how Robin Longstride went from being a soldier in the King’s army to being a champion of the people.  And if the film makes enough money, perhaps we can watch him become a champion of the people some day too. 

    This is a difficult film to review because while watching it I knew I wasn’t enjoying it, but I couldn’t figure out why.  The directing by Ridley Scott was tremendous.  He really knows what he is doing with films like this.  It is his calling to produce magnificent period pieces. 

    And the acting is really great as well, Especially by Crowe and Blanchett.  Crowe gives everything he has to a role and this intensity is truly admirable.  He is  still one of my favorite actors even though he just made another movie I didn’t care for too much.

    After much careful thought, it really does come down to the script.  The original concept of the film, where the Sheriff of Nottingham was the hero and Robin Hood the villain was scrapped for this more traditional idea and the spec script sale which was handsomely paid out to Ethan Reiff and Cyrus Voris was switched out to writer Brian Helgeland (Mystic River) where I’m assuming the story took on a completely new life.  It makes me wonder why Universal bought the original script to begin with, but we’ll never know that one. 
   
    What we do know is that the point of the film is to put the story of Robin Hood in complete historical context.  The filmmakers wanted to ask the question of “why does Robin Hood need to steal from the rich to give to the poor?”  They needed a script that gave a really strong political answer and the only way to do that was to bog the whole film down with detail after detail which made the movie so very boring.  Another thing that leads the film to slow down is that Robin gets his way too easily.  Everything is too convenient.  He escapes from his shackles to find the right uniforms to get on a ship to get back to England where he is openly accepted as a member of Maid Marion’s family.  It’s almost silly, and unfortunately not Men in Tights silly. 

    Also, one thing that every successful Robin Hood film to date has had in common is that they have all been fun.  This one strips the fun right out and converts it into a historical war drama.  But then the big historical war drama gets stripped of most of its violence.  While I don’t think a film like this needed blood and guts everywhere, I do think that if you are to create this kind of movie, it needs to be R-rated.  PG-13 doesn’t cut it.  This looked like the airplane version of the movie and not the epic it could have been. 

    But I still don’t think the added violence could have helped the much needed script problems which I think will ultimately lead to a distracted and uninterested audience.  C-

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New on DVD

New on DVD

Invictus
Rated PG-13 for brief strong language
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
In this Clint Eastwood directed film about South African leader Nelson Mandela starring Morgan Freeman and Matt Damon, the newly appointed leader of the nation chooses to bring the divided country together by uniting them behind a common cause: winning the Rugby World Cup.  It’s such an unconventional story and quite inspirational.  While it did huge business worldwide, it pulled in relatively few dollars in the states.  This could possibly be because of America’s unfamiliarity with Rugby, as the film was certainly one of Eastwood’s most ambitious and the critical response was fairly strong.  I wasn’t too keen on Freeman getting a nomination for best actor here, but Damon definitely earned his best supporting nod (and should have gotten one in the best actor category for The Informant! also in my humble opinion).  And while I’ve still never seen an actual game of rugby, I found the sport to be well represented and well-enough explained for the film to be enjoyed.  A-

Legion
Rated R for strong bloody violence, and language
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
God is angry with mankind and has decided to destroy them, so he sends a group of angels to do his bidding.  But the angel Michael knows that by saving the life of a mother and child at a diner in the middle of nowhere could change God’s mind.  To do so, though, he must lose his wings, steal a ton of guns, and shoot every last creature they throw at him.  So I think it’s safe to say they won’t be showing this one in Sunday School.  This is truly Hollywood trying to be religious and while most theologians will simply ignore the film, those that do watch will do a lot of eye-rolling.  But theology aside, is it a good movie?  Not quite.  Paul Bettany is a terrific actor who keeps picking bad roles that aren’t right for him.  He’s good in this, but the rest of the actors are really pretty horrible.  Lucas Black, Dennis Quaid, and Charles S. Dutton are starting to look like B-movie stars with these kinds of performances.  The special effects aren’t too bad though and it has some good scares, so if that’s all you are looking for then by all means check it out.  But if you are looking for a good film about this subject matter that is actually well written and much better acted, check out the 2005 film Constantine.  C

Valentine’s Day
Rated PG-13 for some sexual material and brief partial nudity
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
The Brits took on Christmas with Love, Actually and did such a great job with it that Hollywood decided to attempt to do the same thing with Valentine’s Day by throwing every actor in town into a blender and seeing what would become of it.  And by every actor, I really do mean most.  Alba, Bates, Biel, Cooper, Dempsey, Elizondo, Foxx, Garner, Grace, Hathaway, Kutcher, Latifah, Lautner, Lopez, MacLaine, Roberts, and Swift with famed romantic comedy director Garry Marshall (Pretty Woman) at the helm.  But they forgot a decent script!  It’s almost as if they said to the actors – “act like it is Valentine’s Day – ACTION!!!”  The story lines are awful and the performances are worse.  Very little of the film seems well thought out at all.  What worked about Love, Actually is that we were interested in the characters.  We didn’t get to spend that much time with them, but that didn’t matter because they were our friends by the end.  And what about that tremendous music driving the entire film?  By the end I think everyone could hum that amazing Craig Armstrong score.  My point is, if you are going to copy a great film, copy it.  Don’t act like you are trying to do something different and then release this kind of drivel.  If Simon Cowell were judging this film I’m fairly certain he would sum it up in the same three words I’ll use: indulgent Hollywood crap.  F

The New Daughter
Rated PG-13 for thematic material including violence, disturbing images and brief strong language
Available on DVD and Blu-ray
In this almost straight-to-DVD release, Kevin Costner is a single dad who has just moved into a creepy house with his young daughter and son.  When the daughter starts to exhibit strange behavior after prolonged exposure to being outside, he starts to believe that there is something on his property that could be possessing her.  While not a great film, for a monster movie with a big name star, it’s not completely bad.  It’s a lackluster horror script, but has decent enough effects and production values.  I’m not sure what kind of draw Costner found with a project like this, but he certainly has seen better days.  C